I know that this may sound a little extreme but I feel like my children are driving me crazy when I deny them access to the internet. When they find out that they can’t play their online games they freak out and start getting agitated. To avoid the trap of getting addicted to online activity, I have decided to make smart rules so that they use the internet responsibly.

In the 21st century, the internet is a fundamental part of how children learn. They use online research journals, educational games, and social media sites to explore new subjects. I strongly believe that parents must be the ones who help their children foster appropriate and positive media use. They need to take an active role in their children’s online life. It is important for schools and parents to teach children how to use these tools responsibly.

Today children use social media to relate to one another. Children are on social media all the time. So my question is whether we as parents know what they are doing? Do we know their passwords, their usernames, and what social media platforms they are using? The latest Pew Internet study found that teens are sharing more personal information than ever before and it’s not just on Facebook. Children are using multiple applications (for example Instagram, Vine, Tumblr, Snapchat, Twitter, Pinterest, Pheed, You-Tube, Kik, 4chan, and Askfm). I believe it is my role as a parent to be aware about where my children are hanging out online. It’s important to establish the rules. However, if we simply lay down the law without giving any explanation then we miss a valuable opportunity to teach our children responsibility and internet safety.

I’m aware of the fact that social media is a sensitive tool. There are upsides and downsides – even danger to this activity. But I can’t forbid my children to participate in the social media-based culture. So I have decided to set guidelines along with a conversation about the best way to

tackle my own challenges. I must make sure that they are following the rules before they sit in front of the screen.

There is an online game app called “Clash of Clans”. I hate to admit it but my 10 year old son has become obsessed with this action-packed, highly-addictive game that he plays on his IPad Touch with his friend. When I discovered that he was completely intrigued by this game and all his friends were scrambling to join “the Clan”, I knew I had to do some research and see if it was something I should be concerned about. What I learned was that my son could allow any stranger to play the game with him if they allowed him in their clan. There is nothing stopping him from joining a clan with people he did not know. So I decided to check the ‘chat’ feature in the ‘Clash of Clans’ game. What I found was that there were no filters on the content or means to report inappropriate behavior in the Clan chat area. Therefore it made sense to talk to my son about this and monitor how he used it. Not only have I decided to set strict time limits on the game. I also try to explain and give him examples about using the web safely. As I often tell my children, no one should drive a car without getting a driving license? And why it is necessary? I strongly believe safety rules are equally important whether we are driving a car or surfing the net. I am in favor of conversations at home with my kids that lead to a better understanding about social media? As a result, in case of trouble my children should know what action they should take or how to solve their problems. These primary steps are essential to teach our children about safety on the internet.

As a mother, another matter of concern for me is online privacy. I want that my children should master skills that make them responsible digital citizens. I make sure that my children are aware of what happens in cyberspace via online posting. I have established firm rules that they should never post a photo or message that they wouldn’t want to have everyone view or which would cause me as a parents concern or embarrassment. As a result before they are posting a picture or downloading any video they need to seek my approval. I try to communicate with my children so they can take traditional safety measures and not become victims of cyberbullying or cyberbullies themselves.

One day my daughter asked me to buy a smart phone for her. Before I bought the phone for her, I wanted to ensure that my daughter is able to wisely use this gadget in their daily routine. For me a smartphone is not a toy; it is a tool. I want that my daughter is used this tool safely. I have often noticed that most children use their phones primarily for socializing (to call, text, Instagram, kik, Facebook and otherwise connect with their friends). I have set very specific rules about the safe and ethical use of social media. I have made it clear to my daughter that posting mean comments, spreading gossip, forwarding embarrassing photos or taking part in any type of unkind activity which can be a source of trouble in the future should not occur. After I bought my daughter a smart phone I monitored how often she used it. I also checked her online activity regularly. If my daughter didn’t follow my rules, I gave her a ‘time out’. For example I took her smart phone away and only gave it back when she promised me that she would not breach the rules again. Similarly I believe that children should learn that mistakes have consequences. The point is to teach self-control among children. Delayed gravitation and not giving in to temptation are learnt skills.

My children dislike having restrictions on their online activates. I should not be afraid to express disapproval. I personally believe in the need to be firm but fair.  There are times when I have to say no, and I expect that my children should obey my instructions. I have to demonstrate my parental right to lead and put some restrictions at home. So I have decided to change the passwords often, and set parental control on all electronic devices. I am aware of what my children are downloading (books, music, movies, apps etc.), and restrict the time that my children can use electronic devices. I take electronic devices away at night (i.e. have the charging station next to mom and dad), and place the PC in a public area.

There is so much revealing information on the internet. Parents have difficulties fathoming internet usage because they have not typically grown up with this technology. It is necessary that parents should learn about this tool so that they may help their children in case of trouble. For me, Internet is like a knife; it can be used for a purpose but if and when one gets a cut, the bruise heals but the mark will never go away. Whatever one posts stays there.

I want my children to become responsible digital citizens; children must be encouraged to work actively to make the internet a fun, safe place for everyone. Moderation is the key to using the internet safely. We must lead the conversation at home about digital technology and help our children become responsible and aware online citizens who look forward to being disconnected from time to time. We must remember to set the proper example of behavior. This paves the path for a successful future for all of us as digital citizens.